YesterdayI noticed that I put myself down, belittle myself. I was installing a component on the transmission line of my transmitter and the engineer from another station was helping me. We were talking about the broadcast industry and about people who don’t work in it anymore because they were no good at it. then I made the comment that I’m no good at it. Like a joke. But I noticed that I felt bad.
I always feel inferior.
I’ve been scuba diving for more than half my life. I’m an instructor for 4 agencies. I dive trimix and I have the best rebreather in the world. I have done a lot of diving in almost every condition, cold, deep, no viz. I have practically every certification except cave. But when I go to the dive shop and see someone else diving, I assume that they are a better diver than me.
It’s a hard habit to break.
In diving, particularly with a rebreather, it often considered the best approach to have the attitude that you’re a bit green and there is still something to learn. This helps offset complacency. I often tell people I’m a novice diver, this keeps them more alert to what I’m doing and they may catch anything I’ve missed.
I posted this post yesterday morning and kind of forgot about it. Yesterday afternoon I swam the half mile and afterwards the OI Girl and I were walking on the beach. There was someone out there swimming. I said “there’s the competition, I’m dead.” (Joking, of course, but that’s the point.) Just then, whoever it was (a head with goggles) stopped swimming and started resting. I started laughing, because I didn’t have to stop and rest.I just wish I would quit making these joking derogotory comments about myself.