This morning

yesterday morning

I can’t sleep. Not ever. Even when I am “sleeping”, I’m awake. Maybe that’s why I remember so many dreams, because I’m not really asleep.

Last night, about 3 AM – ish, the wife said something about a little dog barking. I thought it was a little odd, because I was intently listening to the big dog barking. A big baritone bark. I started rising up through the layers of fog, looking for the little dog and finally I could hear it, yip yip yipping. What was The Wife saying about the little dog? I don’t know, she’s fast asleep again.

A few minutes later, I look at the clock, 3:32. I get my phone and take a picture. I’ve always been fond of  the times 1:11, 2:22, 3:33 and so on. Not to mention 12:34 and 56 seconds.

From then on, I’m trying to go back to sleep. The effort of trying to go back to sleep I liken to when you’re riding a bicycle, trying to go faster.

I feel like a crazy person, trying to go to sleep when  I know the alarm is going to go off in a half hour. 15 minutes… 5 minutes till 5 and I’m trying to get to sleep. I know I should just get up, but I don’t, part of me tells me that I NEED to sleep.

One minute to 5, I pick up the alarm and hold it till it goes off, finger poised over the silence button.

So starts my day.