last night I dreamed I was in my top bunk on my ship in the navy. My tablet wouldn’t fit between my chest and the overhead. I thought to myself “I got to get out of the navy, how long have I been in the navy?”

it went down below freezing last night here in Greensboro North Carolina.

Duke Opthamology completely dropped the ball. There’s two offices, both say the other has to make my appointment. Neither will budge, neither will call the other. They have all my documentation, they know insurance pays 100%. It just can’t make my appointment.

today I’m going to a third place. Piedmont Retina Specialists.

My attitude started with “I want the best surgeon in the world to do my surgery” and went to “I will let anybody who can do it, do it”

I just want to get it done.

Its Monday, had a weekend with friends, trying not to think of the eye stuff. Today is back to it, seeing if I can get surgery sooner and up here instead of Miami.

The nerves are back.

I’m house-sitting while the family is away for Thanksgiving. Above, a cat is spying on me.

I’m thinking of the gratitude I should have had last week or last month that I didn’t properly celebrate

Even now I should have gratitude that I don’t. Someone is waiting for open heart surgery. Imagine how worried they must be and how much more dangerous their situation is compared to me.

But I’m just focused on me, me me. … What an ass.

The doctor rescheduled my appointment because I didn’t have a friend or family member to give me a ride after surgery. Now it’s rescheduled for Dec 02..

What am I going to do till then? Go to North Carolina and see friends and try to get the surgery done at Duke Opthalmology..

Insane.

I’m in miami, it was a good trip at the airbnb. Next is my appointment the eye surgeon.

Im off to Miami for eye surgery!

this blog is over 20 years old after the upgrade by GoDaddy, I am now told I exceed my space limit and need to purchase more space I have 20 gig I guess I should double it to 40. I should be good for another 20 years right?

Happy Tuesday !

i received notifications over the weekend that WordPress would be upgraded. I received a notification that the upgrade and be completed. And now I’m told I cannot upload files because my storage limit has been exceeded.

One more problem to deal with

Laying at night
Need sleep
Freezing sweat
Fear
“Who will I call when I die?”
No one.
Need sleep.
Guided meditation
Count 6 in, count 6 out.
I can’t hear the message because I’m counting.
I can’t count when I’m listening.
The meditation is over.
I missed it.
Back to terror
Need sleep